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Positively Speaking: Learning to say goodbye

Positively Speaking: Learning to say goodbye

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Arlene and I built our dream home 26 years ago. We put every bit of emotion and money into our dream. We even gave it a name, FoxMoore Farm. We finished raising our kids and enjoyed 25 Thanksgiving’s and Christmas’s in this home that is way too big and sits on 40 acres. Our youthful enthusiasm took over. Back in my entrepreneur/CEO days, I definitely lived by the saying, “Go big or go home!”

Yeah ... we over did it.

It’s been for sale for more than five years and we were surprised to get an offer yesterday. Our home has been sold and we have 55 days to figure out what to do. Selling a home this large wasn’t easy, and quite frankly, the investment was a financial disaster, but we enjoyed every minute of the time we lived here.

It’s an odd and unsettling feeling. This is the longest I’ve ever lived in one place. Our kids are now adults. They are grown and gone. I’m fighting a life-threatening illness. The vastness of the acreage has become a burden, so this is the best news we could have received ... yet there is also a sadness hovering over us. The home we dreamed of, designed, and built will be home to someone new. I realize that a building is only a home when filled with the love and joy of a family. Our family has moved on, so it’s time we do the same.

Like I said, our kids are grown, and my grandkids are in California. There was no reason for Arlene and me to hold on to this building with all the expense and work that accompanies it. Common sense is clear. It’s time to move on, but the emotion blurs the vision. Our home will soon belong to others we don’t know. Strangers will walk the halls and enjoy the rooms we built. There is a sadness I am unable to shake. Time stands still for none of us. Life changes and we must adjust with optimism.

Moving on is part of life. We are saying farewell to this beautiful place. I’m optimistic about our future and know it’s in our best interest to downsize ... but saying goodbye is never easy.

Optimism will carry us through this transition.

So, we are off on a journey. The next phase of our lives is before us and I’m positively anticipating happiness and joy. To look forward to anything else is a waste of time. Instead, we choose to look at it as a new adventure ... an opportunity for exciting change and exploring new ways to live and how to reinvent our lives. The anticipation is a fun-filled life with less pressure.

Sure, as I said, the sadness of leaving a place where our kids were raised and our grandchildren love to visit is hard ... it’s natural. We can dwell on that and be sad or we can focus on the stimulating opportunity ahead and find happiness and joy. Like almost everything in life, it is a choice. We choose the optimism of opportunity.

When change comes into your life, and it will, how will you choose to respond? Will you resist? Will you be angry or sad? Will you let the change negatively dominate your life, or will you choose the optimism of the opportunity and look at it as an exciting new journey? An optimistic life is a life filled with hope and happiness. The optimist always believes the best is yet to come. With that belief, the optimistic mind goes to work to make it so.

We are enthusiastically embarking on our journey! It’s a choice we make, and we will always choose optimism.

Will you join us?

— Gary W. Moore is a freelance columnist, speaker, and author of three books including the award-winning, critically acclaimed, “Playing with the Enemy.” Follow Gary on Twitter @GaryWMoore721 and at

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